Do we really need IDAHOBIT? Ryan Portelli, Counsellor

So, what is IDAHOBIT?

IDAHOBIT stands for the International Day Against Homophobia, Biphobia, Intersexism and Transphobia. The 17th of May was chosen by the World Health Organisation as the day to commemorate the need to draw attention to the violence and discrimination experienced by lesbian, gay, bisexuals, transgender, intersex people and all other people with diverse sexual orientations, gender identities or expressions, and sex characteristics.

But let us refocus… Do we really need this?

LGBTIQ+ People, activists, and allies of the LGBTIQ+ Community are very often faced with questions like:

‘Isn’t this another activity to highlight difference? What about all other forms of discrimination? Why should we be so specific in commemorating this?’

All this would have been true if the LGBTIQ+ community was indeed like any other group of people within our community. To this statement, a common reply would be:

‘But the LGBTIQ+ community is like all the rest now, we even passed the laws to make them equal. I think this is all just an excuse to create a fanfare!’.

Such a statement leads us to a reflection on privilege.

The notion of Privilege in Gender and sexuality

Privilege, in relation to gender and sexualities, can be defined as the unearned, often unconscious or taken for granted benefits afforded to a person in society based on their gender or sexual orientation. Having a privilege is not a blame or deterrent in itself. But let us be practical.

Did you have to ever think about…

Walk hand in hand with your intimate partner?
Kiss or express affection to your intimate partner in public?
Searching for positive role models growing up reflecting your gender and/or sexual orientation?
Being concerned you are the only person identifying as so in your group, class, family, work?
To openly talk about your marital projects and plans?
Moving or going to a holiday where you will not be in danger because of your gender identity or sexuality?
Coming out?
Have/raise/adopt a child without the lingering thought or even a comment about the well-being of the child?
What to wear, how to act or talk with the fear of being outed?
Waking up every so often and see an article/TV programme with people arguing that your sexuality or gender orientation is essentially wrong and evil?
Been put in a situation to choose between choosing to be who you are and choosing to be part of a religious group that was part of your identity growing up? Just because who you are is sinful?
Being a professional team sport athlete without the fear of getting ‘caught’?
With hearing someone say ‘What a shame/loss!’ when you come out to them?
Not having to explain that who you are is not a mental health issue, a phase or any other abnormality?

Seems too much, but hey, most people on the LGBTIQ+ spectrum have experienced this. Some on a daily basis. And not having experienced all this is privilege. Very importantly, privilege is not wrong! It’s no one’s fault that a person is privileged in certain aspects.

What can be problematic is the lack of awareness and as a consequence the lack of empathy, understanding and openness to whatever is different which can lead to violence, discrimination or derogatory comments that would affect the wellbeing of people in the LGBTIQ+ community.

LGBTIQ+ Discrimination and Violence

But how real is all this? And how close to home is all this happening? Though in the past years, many advances have been made, safety and full acceptance are still far. The EU Agency for Fundamental Rights surveyed nearly 140,000 and concluded that one in five LGBTIQ+ respondents felt discriminated against at work and more than one in three felt "discriminated against when going out to eat, drink or being social" (FRA, 2019).

Only last year, Hungary (a country part of the European Union) passed a law in parliament making it impossible for transgender people to legally change their gender. Clearly, a law that has created immense discomfort and a higher risk of discrimination and violence in daily situations where the binary system of gender would put Transgender and intersex people in a more vulnerable position.

Almost concurrently, Poland gave birth to LGBT-free zones. Around 100 towns and regions in Poland have declared themselves as LGBT-free zones meaning that they consider themselves as rejecting the LGBT ideology. This impacted hundreds of LGBTIQ+ people that for their own safety had to go back to the closet or never leave it given the hostile environment that was created in these areas.

And in Malta? Well luckily to date we did not have legislation directed at discriminating LGBTIQ+ people but unfortunately, this is not enough. A few months back, our parliament/committee was discussing the Equality law. Some tweaking (which was affected) was needed but still, resistance is being found for this law. Without the implementation of this law, to date, a fertility clinic can choose to only serve heterosexual couples, without breaking the law. A barber might choose to serve only heterosexual cis-gender males, without breaking the law. An establishment can choose not to allow trans people to use changing rooms according to their gender and even this is not breaking the law. Clearly consequential that an LGBTIQ+ person knowing this will not feel very safe.

COVID-19 and the LGBTIQ Communities

“As the world is focused on efforts to contain the COVID-19 pandemic, we remember and highlight the particular challenges faced by lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and intersex (LGBTI) persons in many parts of the world. They often are confronted with stigma, discrimination, and restrictions in access to health services due to discriminatory laws and negative social attitudes” – Josep Borell, High Representative of the Union for Foreign Affairs and Security Policy since 2019.

How did the LGBTIQ+ community get impacted by the COVID-19 pandemic?

Many were those that have advocated for lockdown across the board in an attempt to curb the rise in COVID-19 transmission. And in some cases, such an approach was successful, notwithstanding that it was not without its repercussions. Reportedly, LGBTIQ+ people struggled with lockdowns and quarantines living in environments (family, roommates, etc.) that are very homophobic or identity non-affirming spaces. Having to restrain your gender expression and sexuality 24/7 because of non-accepting parents or being forced to delay/rush a coming-out process were two of the main reasons why LGBTIQ+ people were struggling with negative effects on their mental health.

In Conclusion…

Is there a need for IDAHOBIT? Is it just another excuse to create a fanfare? Clearly LGBTIQ+ support and counselling service are still having an increasing number of referrals. It is evident that LGBTIQ+ people’s mental health is being impacted, and the pandemic just highlighted what is still lurking in our communities: the difficulty to accept what is not the norm. Living in a situation like this creates difficulties in identity acceptance, internalised homophobia, depressive episodes, high anxiety, shame, self-hate/loathing, suicide, and suicide ideation. A day like IDAHOBIT should act as a reminder:

For LGBTIQ+ people speak out and educate, if this is within your ability at the moment, try to educate and communicate with one individual in our society. It should also act as a reminder that support, counselling, and therapy are available and that no one should deal with their mental health difficulties alone.
For our societies that not everyone has the same privilege and the only way to balance this privilege is to be aware of it and advocate for equal treatment. Discrimination and Violence are non-acceptable alternatives and therefore the duty is to be allies to the LGBTIQ+ community.
For professionals to read something new, seek more training, ask necessary questions for professional growth so that when required to help someone passing through these rough patches, professionals do not replicate the lack of understanding that society would already have done.

IDAHOBIT can be our reminder that it is our duty to make sure that all the diversities in our communities are seen as beautifully different but equally important and that the quality of life should never be tarnished.