Tired of Feeling Tired?
Day-to-Day Tips to take care of Yourself
An article written by Ms Clara Attard Farrugia, Family and Systemic practitioner
We long to take care of our loved ones, our children, partners, elderly, pets and plants. We love and rejoice when we see them doing well and flourish, and so it should be. However, sometimes this comes at the cost of losing and forgetting ourselves along the way. We feel depleted, physically and emotionally drained. This can lead to feelings of frustration, irritability, and sometimes anger and sadness if the work we do for others is not acknowledged or appreciated.
Stress and fatigue could further lead to medical and emotional consequences such as anxiety and depression, and turbulent relational dynamics. The burden and exhaustion take over, leaving us tired and unable to connect with our loved ones! And that is why actively taking care of ourselves is far from being selfish, but rather a way to replenish and an act to take care of our mental, emotional and physical well-being and be there for and with our loved ones to enjoy each others company.
According to the World Health Organization,
“Self-care is the ability of individuals, families and communities to promote health, prevent disease, maintain health, and to cope with illness and disability with or without the support of a healthcare provider”.
Everything within our context can contribute to our well-being. Self-care incorporates our emotional, spiritual, physical, and psychological states that are influenced by our relationships, work and everyday lives.
So what can we do to take care of our own needs?
First, remind yourself that you matter and that this sentiment should not be a selfish one, but rather a selfless one, since the act of taking care of oneself is as necessary as when we care and love others around us. There is no one way or one thing as a form of self-care, but you may have or realise something particular that is tailor-made for your needs, which you can adapt and fit in your daily routine.
I invite you to reflect for a few minutes about what comes to mind when you think about:
What is it that helps you calm down… relax… slow down…replenish?
Do you remember a moment when you managed to consciously do something and feel better? What physical, thoughts and emotional differences did you notice? What helped? Was it whilst:
Going for 5 minutes’ walk around the block, the valley, next to the beach?
Reading a book, whilst letting yourself become part of the story on that comfortable sofa or a bench in the countryside?
Taking a shower/bath and feeling the water splashing on your face, smelling the sweet smell of your bubble bath whilst listening to the soothing sound of the water?
Sipping a cup of tea on the terrace whilst gazing at the sun and smelling that incredible smell of the freshly brewed coffee?
Going to the bathroom to take some good deep breaths and reminding yourself that it is fine and everything will be ok?
Looking at the mirror and have a chat with yourself? Validating and permitting oneself to be sad, angry, afraid or acknowledging any other emotions whilst embracing yourself?
Calling out a friend to have a chat? Or hanging out with someone you enjoy being with?
Setting boundaries: at your workplace, setting a time till what time you will be replying to work-related emails?
Cooking and eating a good healthy meal?
Practising a hobby such as painting, gardening or pottery? Just letting that freehand guide your fingertips and expressing oneself whilst letting oneself free from other worries?
Keeping a journal: writing nice memories, positive comments you received from other people or just letting out your thoughts on a piece of paper as a way of taking care of your emotional needs?
If any of these suggestions worked for you in the past, then make a plan to do them as often as needed to feel like your best self again. If not, maybe some of these suggestions inspire you and give them a go. If not, do not worry! As one of my favourite quotes goes:
“Every accomplishment starts with a decision to try”.
I encourage you to sit back for a few minutes and ask yourself: What do I enjoy doing? How does it usually make me feel? Does it help me? How? How much time do I need? How can I practice self-care daily? Be kind to yourself and pick what is practical and possible for you as long as it is something that you enjoy doing and feel more like yourself afterwards.
Whilst practising the act of self-care turns your attention to your body, to your senses, your thoughts, your feelings to consciously experience the benefits of self-care. Do it when you can and make it part of your daily routine! Do not leave it to the last minute when you are already worn out and exhausted. The more you consciously practise self-care, the more you can re-balance yourself, find the calmness, concentration, and emotional balance to continue with your day! It is important to plan any self-care activities that you consciously know you can do. This will increase the sense of satisfaction by giving yourself priority and importance. So plan and keep to basic self-care activities that perpetuate relaxation and re-balancing your mind, body and emotional well-being.
A gentle reminder, dear reader:
YOU ARE WORTH
THE QUIET MOMENT.
YOU ARE WORTH
THE DEEPER BREATH.
YOU ARE WORTH
THE TIME IT TAKES,
TO SLOW DOWN,
BE STILL, AND REST.
MHN.
Ms Clara Attard Formosa, Family and Systemic practitioner
Ms Clara Attard Formosa graduated in 2010 with an honours degree in Social Work and later furthered her studies by reading for a Master degree in Family Therapy and Systemic Practice from the University of Malta. Ms. Attard Formosa worked in various fields of service, including, homelessness, substance abuse and addictions, schools and community-based services. Having worked for the past 10 years in the social sector, Ms. Attard Formosa worked with different clients coming from different backgrounds, including, children, youths, adults and families. Ms. Attard Formosa takes a systemic and relational approach when working with her clients and seeks to understand her clients within their social context and how the different systems effect each other. Ms. Attard Formosa likes to take an experiential and creative approach to support her clients in various issues including communication and relational problems, abuse, trauma, mental health issues and challenging behaviour. Send an email to info@taascmalta.com
